Complicated!

The denseness in relationships, an intricate state of mind is what could be called as a perfect Complicated Life. There is lot to understand in the otherwise simplest statement I just made.

I always knew about me being complicated! I don’t know but I guess it was the onus of being good. When I say being good, I mean a good daughter, a good sister, a good wife, a good daughter-in-law, a good host, a good friend – no I guess those who stand by me – never bother about me being good or bad, Ah! just realized I have been ‘me’ at certain occasions. Anyways, the benefit of living with the onus of being good is that you never get carried away and you learn to self-restrict. Its like how could I?

Aren’t the words getting complicated? I say so, because I came back to this page after almost an hour after I finished the above paragraph. I have a loss of words. I am worried. Its not usual………I normally finish up my write-ups. I feel I am confused with my words & state of mind. Does this happen to you as well?

But yes, we were talking about the benefits of living with the onus of being good. Hey! What about the drawbacks….many of them. You always keep a part of you closed which shall be unearthed but you die waiting for the right time, right place & may be right people. You always carry this notion – that there is something which people don’t understand or may be something which you want them to listen & understand. You die with a heavy heart because there was so much to say for which you never managed to get an ear for. So many…so sad!

Anyways………I would end it up with what I always believed is the truth at the end of the day. Life is Beautiful. It’s either us or the situations which are complicated!

Being kind of perfect ;-)

Buddha says, "When you realize how perfect everything is you will tilt your head back & laugh at the sky."

Have you ever wondered what it means to be kind of perfect? Well! I think it means a lot. I totally agree to the saying that goes like, nobody is perfect. Whoever said this must have thought of making the chase to perfection a never ending affair. And I guess that’s the perfect idea! What say?

But ‘Feeling Perfect’ sometimes is good for health, happiness & life. One must feel at times and say to oneself... ‘Oh yeah! I am kind of perfect’. If you find this idea weird- all I would say is try this once & experience. When life ditches you at times, people don’t understand, friends don’t have the time and loved ones are ignorant, the technique of feeling perfect works wonders. This feeling itself fills one with lot of confidence & courage. It brings the otherwise negative vibes back on track and a sudden rush thrills us. It makes us feel that everything around is Perfect like Buddha says!

‘Feeling perfect’ not only gives confidence, instead it’s a quick dosage of assurance & conformity. Only thing one should be careful about is Arrogance. This kills the beauty of being perfect. This pulls in negativity & eventually starts ruling over the brain and then captures the speech. Arrogance must be avoided to the last extent.

So, all I am trying to say is, Next time you feel low just look at yourself in the mirror and say – I am my good. I am what I am. O yeah! I am kind of perfect ;-)

And yes, share with me – the difference you feel. Cheers!

OPRAH WINFREY ON RELATIONSHIPS......!

This is just an e-mail fwd., quite good & interesting read..........

WHAT OPRAH WINFREY HAD TO SAY ABOUT MEN

If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away.
If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay.
Stop making excuses for a man and his behaviour.
Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache.
Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that's not meant to be.

Slower is better.

Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy.

If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can't 'be friends'. A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend.
Don't settle.

If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is
Don't stay because you think 'it will get better'
You'll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better.
The only person you can control in a relationship is you.

Avoid men who've got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women.

He didn't marry them when he got them pregnant,
why would he treat you any differently?

Always have your own set of friends separate from his.
Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you.
If something bothers you, speak up.

Never let a man know everything.* He will use it against you later.

You cannot change a man's behaviour.* Change comes from within.

Don't EVER make him feel he is more important than you are...
Even if he has more education or in a better job.

Do not make him into a quasi-god.
He is a man, nothing more nothing less.
Never let a man define who you are.
Never borrow someone else's man.

A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you.

All men are NOT dogs.

You should not be the one doing all the bending...
Compromise is two way street.

You need time to heal between relationships...
There is nothing cute about baggage...
Deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship

You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you...
A relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals...
Look for someone complimentary...not supplementary.

Dating is fun...even if he doesn't turn out to be Mr. Right.

Make him miss you sometimes...when a man always know where you are, and you're always readily available to him - he takes it for granted

Never move into his mother's house. Never co-sign for a man.

Don't fully commit to a man who doesn't give you everything that you need.*
Keep him in your radar but get to know others.

Scared of being alone is what makes a lot of women stay in relationships
that are abusive or hurtful: Dr. Phil

You should know that:
You're the best thing that could ever happen to anyone and if a man mistreats you, he'll miss out on a good thing. If he was attracted to you in the 1st place, just know that he's not the only one.

They're all watching you, so you have a lot of choices.
Make the right one.

Ladies take care of your own hearts....

Share this with other women and men (just so they know)...

You'll make someone smile, another rethink her choices,
and another woman prepare.

IIM Shillong tour Aug'09 - Twist & Turns and the rains!

What else could be great thing to do right now? I am sitting at the Guwahati airport and just cannot wait to reach home. I had come from Delhi on 18th for a 3 days tour to IIM Shillong. Well! The entire tour was great and adventurous every day. It was a tour of bad weather & constant delays and more delays.

On 18th, I was supposed to reach Shillong in the afternoon. I remember queries were made on what I would prefer to eat in lunch. The flight took off from Delhi with an hour delay, the reason – bad weather. Then the aptain made an announcement before Bagdogra that there is – zero visibility so while us (me & other passengers) enjoyed our stay in the sky, the air hostess told me that in this case we would be reaching Guwahati around 12.15. With this I realized that I am going to miss my helicopter to Shillong scheduled at 12.30pm. I anyways reached Guwaati at 12 only to realize that I have not missed the helicopter, infact, its been cancelled on account to bad weather (heavy rainfall) in the region. Phew! I was so excited about the helicopter ride. Huh! Anyways, that’s what we call life is! Finally the staff of IIM had made an alternate arrangement for a taxi and that’s how I could make it to IIM Shillong around 5.15pm. Did ya noticed that I had a session at 6pm. Well though they had asked me to relax and the delay can be done, I don’t know why it din’t appealed me and as a result my session began at 6.20pm. I am glad to write it, that it was well received and appreciated. So I can say with that half of fatigue was gone with that.

That was just the start of it. That night it rained and next day –it rained again and it rained almost the entire day. This was the reason, why I couldn’t capture the scenic beauty of Shillong in my camera lens. Anyways the session went really well on second day. I was able to help my audience understand the concepts with tints of humor and as a result the journey was worth it. It was a good batch to interact with and I am now returning with good moments with me.

But wait! That’s not the end of it. The real fun was yet to begin. My departure from Guwahati was scheduled at 4.35 pm, the next evening and taking a lesson from how I had reached I decided to start real early as I thought its always better to sit at the airport almost 2 hours before the flight then to make last moment hush. So I started at 10am sharp. And I enjoyed the drive till 1pm, though it was a bit slow because of the numerous carrier trucks being stopped on the way to Guwahati. I never actually enjoyed the car rides in hilly areas; somehow it makes me uncomfortable with certain goose bumps at the curvy u-turns on hill slopes. But since it was almost a not stop rainfall (sometime heavy, sometimes teeming and other times pleasant), the weather was too pleasant and I was actually enjoying the little drops on my face (I decided to keep the window open). The water falls on the slopes were amazing. It was wonderfully beautiful. But what after 1pm – yes, here comes the twist, a traffic jam; a huge one which I found lasted to some 20 something kms.

I am patient.

I realized God has blessed me with immense patience and lot of hope. Though I was praying but I did not panic. The drivers as they are known for, were spreading all aweful information right between the jam. Few were, It’s a 4 days long jam! Almost everybody has returned. People are here since last 2 days! Oh! That meghalaya cabby returned! They say it’s till Guwahati! Almost 60-70 cabs have returned! And what not….huh!

Finally, since they had already made a cartel over there, one of them was able to make his passenger hop on a bike to be dropped at the next town. Indirect suggestion came to me as well. Undoubtedly by then I was scared. I decided to inform the professor at IIM Shillong who told me just not to leave the cab at all. So, now I was sure of one thing. I then called up my husband – who dint looked that vary that time as still there were almost 3 hours left for my flight. Am sure, he too was hopeful that time.

Well, I was tired, hungry, disturbed and alert. Something about the crowd around me made be alert. May be the fact that it was a traffic jam in an absolutely unknown area with no relatives, friends or even acquaintances around. Though the mobile battery was full, I was praying that it should last till this jam.

Finally, it was 3.45 and I was almost 50 kms away from the Airport, very much in the jam when I decided to cancel my flight and I did that. By then, there was some movement in traffic and we were moving with some tiny steps. And finally, I reached the Guwahti airport at sharp 6.50pm only to find out that there are absolutely no flights after 7pm from the airport. By that time almost all the permutations/combinations were explored & discussed with my inviting Prof. from IIM, my husband & one of my friend. The delay had put all in vein. Apart from that my husband was told to tell me that not to roam out in the region and to prefer some government hotel in Guwahati. All this added to my worsening situation, Then the cabby started showing tantrums as he had to go back and the deal was till the Airport (as if it was me who ordered for a JAM to be arranged on the way). Once again the IIM staff came to the rescue and within minutes I was informed of my stay being arranged at the NEHU (North Eastern Hills Univerity) guest house which is just 5 minutes drive from the airport. Though, I was fine but at the same time I was bit panicky by then, thanks to the rains to make the evening dark even at 7pm and then the cabby did the rest.

I reached the guest house and asked them for a quick tea and a vegetarian dinner later (In North East, Vegetarianism is not a common phenomena). Only after reaching there did I realize that I have been sitting in the car for almost 9 hours with just a sandwhich & coffee being consumed at 9am.

Anyways after the tea, I was at peace with all concerned informed & assured of me being fine and also that I will be reaching home tomorrow. Incidentally, right now I am in the flight on the way to home in Gurgaon. I would say I am tired and still disturbed on once again being put to test by God. I wonder why he loves me so much. But then I am assured he makes sure I am fine and at ease all by myself.

I would like to thank the IIM Shillong staff for their kind co-operation & support. And also to those who kept on calling & messaging just to show that I matter 

Be a teacher.

Be a teacher. This is an effort, a try, a pray which is been initiated by one of my friend for a quality education with raised standards, infrastructure & facilitators.

For more details, you can read here.

If Only.....!

We shall fall in love today....if only its love!

For past is not to be remembered and for future so unknown....

For you never know I will be pulled away.....why repent later?

That I could never say...what it was to fall in love and feel loved by you!

But today...I could not recall a surprise from you! Our last date or a carefree smile!

For I wanted that all, for no reason...but for us being together...these are all the celebrations.....!

I feel the little moments are real treasure......what we call a carefree leisure!

You believe in building future and I am afraid we are loosing today! I am scared of your fears....though I know you think of future and of me!

I count my days to spend with thee... Life is unpredictable and I might flee!

For now I hope you agree that, If only it is to live....

Life is to love and to smile.....So! Again I say, We shall fall in love today!

Circle of Growth & Change!

I am a little lost….

For they have changed the roads I traveled!

I am a little lost….

For I can go back never!

I am a little happy….

Because I have saved some hope!

I am a little tense…..

For more loss of sense!

I am a little of me….

And a lot of me am lost for no better!

I am a little shy….

For I know there are no answers to my whys?

I am a lot more…..

But most of me am lost forever!

I am my Dad’s little girl……

What pity! I am a grown up what for that matter!